Emotional Intelligence - The Art Of Working Through Emotions

A Skill That Can Be Mastered By Anyone

It has been said that Emotional Intelligence is as important as IQ for success in anyone's life

This is in reference to the ability to identify and manage one's own emotions, as well as how it effects the way we interact or adapt interactions with others

People with high emotional intelligence have a talent to read people well, and people like them

There are three fundamental requirements needed to acquiring this skill

Awareness of one's own emotions, then regulating one's own emotions when necessary with reasoning and problem solving, and thirdly, being able to manage concerted relationships

For many of us, this can really be scary or difficult bringing ourselves to be in touch with our own feelings, let alone work through them or discuss it with others

Unfortunately, it has been misunderstood by most who consider this to be a sign of 'weakness' rather than strength
Only because of a misleading characteristic position that people should only be allowed to be 'perpetually positive' to be considered as living a successful life

Since anyone learning to be more emotionally skilled won’t eliminate all their negative feelings or be in a constant state of bliss, part of emotional intelligence is realizing that our feelings aren’t our enemies, they deserve attention to be processed

Psychologist Marc Brackett, the founder of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence, disagrees that this tendency to avoid feelings, though understandable, can be a real disadvantage

He developed a system, using the acronym R.U.L.E.R.:

R: Recognize
U: Understand
L: Label
E: Express
R: Regulate

If the R, U, and L are about getting into touch with our emotions, the E and R are about what to do with them

Whether we like it or not, our feelings affect our thinking and behavior. Being out of touch with these feelings just means we’re at the mercy of them

One way of sharpening your emotional intelligence skills is to become conscious of your moods, their effect on your actions and reactions is the main cause of other people's behavior or reactions towards you

And when dealing with people, remember you're not dealing with creatures of logic, but with creatures of emotion. -Dale Carnegie

Also, you're not responsible for other people's behavior or moods. never be pushed to react emotionally to criticism. provocation, verbal insult or abuse
You should only respond if you consider it absolutely necessary to do so, analyze yourself to determine whether the criticism is justified. If it is, correct yourself, otherwise, go on about your business

By engaging in quiet self-reflection to think about, articulate what you’re feeling and then to use that information to inform your behavior and thoughts, it will transform circumstances
Then the more able you're going to be in managing life's inevitable stresses and savor its pleasures

In the meantime, just recently for Business EI skills there were four domains defined with 12 competencies which are all related to leadership development, which are:

Self-awareness
Emotional Self-awareness

Self-management
Emotional self-control
Adaptability
Achievement orientation
Positive outlook

Social awareness
Empathy
Organizational awareness

Relationship management
Influence
Coach and mentor
Conflict management
Teamwork
Inspirational leadership

The idea that a manager is all about being sweet and chipper has nothing to do with being great for the job, the same applies for the one being oppressive and authoritarian that is why today most companies are being selective about their employees attitude and emotional intelligence over experience

Emotional intelligence is a way of recognizing, understanding, and choosing how we think, feel, and act. It shapes our interactions with others and our understanding of ourselves. It defines how and what we learn; it allows us to set priorities; it determines the majority of our daily actions. Research suggests it is responsible for as much as 80 percent of the "success" in our lives. -J. Freedman

Quote for us:
It is very important to understand that emotional intelligence is not the opposite of intelligence, it is not the triumph of heart over head--it is the unique intersection of both. -David Caruso